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  1. #1
    Moderator RX951's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    League City, Texas

    Red face Wisdom of Larry The Cable Guy

    • A day without sunshine is like night.
    • On the other hand, you have different fingers.
    • 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
    • 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
    • Remember, half the people you know are below average.
    • He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
    • Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
    • The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese in the trap.
    • Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have.
    • A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
    • Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.
    • If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.
    • How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.
    • OK, so what's the speed of dark?
    • When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
    • Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
    • How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?
    • Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines
    • What happens if you get scared half to death, twice?
    • Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
    • Inside every older person is a younger person wondering, What the heck happened?"
    • Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
    • Life isn't like a box of chocolates, it's more like a jar of jalapeno's; what you do today might burn your butt tomorrow.

  2. #2
    Site Admin MikeTrin's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Overland Park, ks
    I don't think those are from Larry the Cable guy. I think i saw some of those in the class of 99 song and steven wright.

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