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  1. #1
    Moderator shawn alladio's Avatar
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    Support in times of grieving or witnessing an accident

    WHEN SOMEONE HAS LOST A LOVED ONE

    IN A DROWNING ACCIDENT...



    WHEN SOMEONE HAS BEEN TRAUMATIZED AS

    A WITNESS TO A DROWNING INCIDENT...



    If you have lost a loved one to drowning or witnessed someone drown...



    ∑ Recognize that you are in shock.

    ∑ If the physical remains have been recovered, you will begin the natural grieving process, but the emotional trauma will also need a lot of time to heal.

    ∑ If the physical remains are missing (for example if your friend or loved one is "missing and presumed drowned") this may lead to a prolonged ordeal with the search and recovery process and a great deal of exposure to trauma if you remain on scene or participate in the recovery efforts.

    ∑ There is GRIEF. And there is TRAUMA.

    ∑ Drowning deaths are always traumatic. Educate yourself about the normal grieving process, as well as traumatic grief and post-traumatic stress.



    THINGS TO TRY TO RELIEVE SOME OF THE STRESS:



    Structure your time-keep busy...

    ∑ Periods of strenuous physical exercise, alternated with relaxation will help alleviate some of the physical reactions

    ∑ You are normal and having a normal reaction - do not label yourself as "crazy" even though things may feel slightly crazy at the moment



    ∑ Talk to people - talk is the best medicine



    ∑ Be aware of numbing the pain with overuse of drugs or alcohol



    ∑ Reach out - PEOPLE DO CARE



    ∑ Maintain as normal a schedule as possible



    ∑ Spend time with others if it feels right to do so, but allow for quiet reflection as well



    ∑ Help your family, friends, and co-workers as much as possible by sharing your feelings and checking out how they area doing



    ∑ Give yourself permission to feel rotten and share your feelings with others



    ∑ Keep a journal; write your way through those sleepless hours



    ∑ Do things that make you feel good



    ∑ Realize you are under stress



    ∑ Don't make any big life changes



    ∑ Do make as many daily decisions as possible which will give you a feeling of control over your life. i.e. if someone asks you what you want to eat, answer them even if you are not sure



    ∑ Get plenty of rest



    ∑ Recurring thoughts, dreams, flashbacks are normal - don't try to fight them - they should decrease over time and become less painful



    ∑ Eat well balanced and regular meals (even if you don't feel like it)



    FOR FAMILY MEMBERS AND FRIENDS

    ∑ Listen carefully



    ∑ Spend time with the traumatized person



    ∑ Offer your assistance and a listening ear, even if they have not asked for help



    ∑ Reassure them that they are safe



    ∑ Help them with everyday tasks like cleaning, meal preparations, caring for the family, etc.



    ∑ Give them some private time



    ∑ Don't take their anger or other feelings personally



    ∑ Don't patronize them with platitudes, including comments like, "Don't worry, your loved one is with God now..." Traumatized and grieving people are not always consoled by those statements. Instead tell them that you are sorry that such an event has occurred and that you want to support and assist them in whatever ways will be useful to them





    Education is a vital part of the healing process. Review the information posted on websites, or if you feel you need additional support seek counseling or join a grief support network. The Drowning Support Network


  2. #2
    Moderator shawn alladio's Avatar
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    Here is a link with hopefully some good resources:

    http://www.giftfromwithin.org/html/groups.html

  3. #3
    A small saying I always keep in mind. "Pain shared is pain halved" Its helped me over the years.

  4. #4

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    trauma is a heck of a thing...my son still suffers emotional issues sometimes from what we went through almost 2 years ago now...football has been a good outlet for him...I know i still deal with physical pain daily from all the damage done to my body as well. It was hard to watch and see all those people die around us and all that.....

  5. #5
    troy boy's Avatar
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    I raced superbikes and jet skis back in the day, 1982 thru 1996 and saw many traumatic incidences and realized equipment was replacable and people were not, it is always sad to see those things but they happen and have to be understood. troy

  6. #6
    surferd15's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bighad View Post
    trauma is a heck of a thing...my son still suffers emotional issues sometimes from what we went through almost 2 years ago now...football has been a good outlet for him...I know i still deal with physical pain daily from all the damage done to my body as well. It was hard to watch and see all those people die around us and all that.....
    Do you mind me asking what happened?

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